“Why not machete the rest of the federal pie?” blogs the Con Man. “Because the two biggest pieces are all but untouchable: entitlement programs like Medicare, Medicaid, and Social Security; and military spending of all kinds. Like the teabagger who said to get the government’s damn hands off his damn social security, military spending gets a pass post-9/11 in the name of national security. The same conservatives who decry government spending have a blind spot bigger than a silver dollar when it comes to all things military. Regardless of sexual orientation in Congress, when it comes to defense spending literally anything goes—and there was no better example of the futility of scrutinizing the military than Secretary of Defense Bob Gates attempts to crack down.